Tuesday, February 25, 2020

Guest Post by Valerie Nifora, author of I Asked the Wind: A Collection of Romantic Poetry

There was a healthcare study completed in 2018 by a leading Health Insurer, that noted 3 out of 4 American's struggle with loneliness with 43% feeling isolated from others, as well as feeling a lack companionship and a lack of meaning in relationships. 

People have asked me what compelled me to decide to try to publish my poetry. And the answer is, I wanted to take this subject of loneliness in romantic relationships and talk about it. My book,  I Asked the Wind: A Collection of Romantic Poetry chronicles my feelings of loneliness in relationships that spanned over 15 years. I would sit quietly in a corner somewhere, and just pour my heart out onto the pages of my journal which I kept well hidden. When I was feeling brave, I  would share a poem or two  with a very small handful of friends, until one day one of them said, she thought this might be my gift.  She said she thought they were lovely and perhaps then might help someone else. It was her suggestion to share them, that prompted my journey. I'm here to tell you, if you're feeling lonely, you're not alone.

Everyone at one point or another in his or her life will feel lonely. It's just part of making it through in this existence. If you have a love, or lost a love, or are waiting for love -- well, it's all part of this intricate dance called living. And the worst part of loneliness is, that you naturally never know how long it will last. But, if there's one thing that I've learned about the human heart, is that it has an incredible capacity to heal. It has an incredible capacity to give. And the one thing that got me through the loneliest days -- besides my writing -- is this simple quote that was given to me on a bookmark -- "The heart that gives freely is never lonely." 

The cure often for loneliness is giving. Giving of your time. Giving of your talent. Giving of your perspective. Out there somewhere right now is another person who's feeling lonely. Perhaps, even you, reading this? And I'm here to tell you, I know how that feels. I feel that too. And when I do feel it -- I go out. I go to the library. I talk to a librarian and have her help me find a good book. I go and volunteer somewhere for an hour. I attend a webinar, a class, a seminar, a session -- anything so I can learn and perhaps share what I've learned. And when all else fails, I write. Yes, it might cure the sting of loneliness for a little bit of time, but it's amazing how small investments in giving, reap such incredible harvests in time. 

So, if you're feeling lonely. Just know, you are not alone. 


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